In IT channels, for years there was a simple rule: the customer is always right and the partner always says yes. Discount? Yes. Short deadline? Yes. An implementation that no one has done before? Also yes – as long as you win the tender and maintain the relationship.
Today, this model is no longer working. The more partners want to be advisors and not just doers, the more often they have to learn to say ‘no’. And to do so in a way that does not break contact – but builds trust.
The partner industry has grown on relationships over the years. Large implementations have been won with loyalty, flexibility and a willingness to make concessions. This is natural – the customer pays, so demands. And a partner who fails to meet expectations is easily out of the game.
The problem is that many of these ‘expectations’ today are not only unrealistic, but also dangerous: to profitability, to the team, to reputation. Agreeing to everything ends up overloading projects, losing control of the scope, and often losing trust – because the client sees the partner agreeing to everything, but not defending anything.
Systemic factors are also often behind over-compliance:
– pressure from vendors to close quarterly targets,
– no competitive advantage (everyone has products),
– too much dependence on a single client.
As a result, the leaders of partner companies are themselves trapped: they choose a short-term ‘yes’, even though they know that a professional ‘no’ should follow.
In the enterprise environment, especially in IT channels, saying no is often treated as a risk: the customer will get offended, the project will be lost, the vendor will ask “what’s going on?”. Meanwhile, a well-communicated ‘no’ can be the very thing that builds a partner’s position.
Because ‘no’ does not necessarily mean conflict. It can mean:
– We have understood the expectations, but we believe that this solution will not work,
– this range is not realistic at the time,
– the discount offer does not correspond to the value of our service.
Leaders who can say ‘no’ with justification show not only courage but competence. They don’t behave like salesmen – they behave like advisers. And contrary to fears, clients appreciate this. Because no one wants a partner who agrees to everything – and then backs out of it.
It is not about assertiveness for the sake of principle. It’s about situations where agreeing would do more harm than refusing. Such as:
- Demanding implementation in an unrealistic timeframe, with no buffer for testing and acceptance – which usually ends in a rollback and loss of trust.
- Requests to cut costs at the expense of quality, e.g. without adequate resources, documentation or a training phase.
- Forcing discounts without changing the scope – hitting profitability and team motivation.
- Suggestions that do not comply with regulations (RODO, ISO, security standards), but “because the board wants it that way”.
In such situations, leaders act differently from salespeople. Instead of running away from confrontation, they name the risks, explain the consequences and – crucially – offer alternatives. This is not shutting down the conversation, but moving it to the level of decisions, not demands.
Refusal is not just about defending the company’s interests. It is also part of building a relationship based on balance. A partner who has an opinion and is able to defend it becomes more than just a supplier to the customer – it becomes a trusted advisor.
This translates into tangible benefits:
- Better projects – because they are carried out under realistic conditions, with a clear scope.
- Stronger negotiating position – both vis-à-vis the customer and the vendor.
- Stronger teams – because people see that the leader is not sacrificing their time and quality of work to get a contract ‘by force’.
The partner channel has to play a different role than it did a decade ago. It is no longer enough to ‘sell and implement’. The customer expects decisions, not just execution. And this means that IT company leaders must have the courage to say ‘no’ – not from a position of strength, but from a position of responsibility.
Refusal, well-grounded and constructive, does not destroy a relationship. On the contrary, it builds its deeper foundation. At a time when trust and credibility are as important as technology, the ability to say ‘no’ is becoming one of a leader’s most important tools.
